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Published By Gwenith Kikkawa on June 24th, 2010 in Circle Stories From The Heart
I heard a call from the ancestors to come to Germany. I was being asked to be a bridge builder connecting with our sisters and brothers across the ocean. I decided to heed the call to find and rediscover the place we call ‘Germany’ that lives within me.
I had a plan for the beginning and end of my journey, but had no idea of what would happen in between. I trusted the Spirits would guide me as I followed the footsteps of the ancestors.
This is part of the unfolding story of losing myself in Germany only to find myself again while holding the question ‘What will I do with my one wild and precious life’?
She hid far away her pain and sorrows deep under a thick dark cloak so no light would shine through, for fear of this light being stolen again.
Slowly she began to remove the cloak and the many layers of cloaks of protection
to reveal the divine light within.
I decided to go on this journey alone to find the depths of who I am, without my usual companion and guardian. I would go it alone to see if I could find my way back home to myself.
Without the removal of these cloaks or layers, there could not be healing, for the healing comes in sharing this light in the world. Sometimes even though many layers have been removed the light begins to dull again.
It has been a long and arduous journey and many angels come to support me along the way. They take my hand in times of loneliness, when I am confused about which way to go, and when I feel lost. There is always an angel providing me with a roof over my head and a place to rest and eat. I am welcomed warmly and embraced by loving and generous hearts.
A plateau is reached and when we reach this plateau it is the time for new growth, expansion and renewal. It is a never ending story, but each time I come to a newer understanding.
What am I to do with my one wild and precious life?
At the tree of life, anaconda greets me by swallowing me whole. The acids quickly burn away my skin and bones as I melt and decompose inside the snake’s belly. The snake begins to shed layers and layers of skin, removing what is no longer needed.
When we are taken down to our vulnerabilities we gain strength. When we go to our weakest spot, the place that seeks healing, the raw point, the place we fear and have shut down, when we go there, we find the pain that has been hidden there for a long, long, long, long, time…perhaps generations.
This is where we feel the deep sadness, pain, sorrow, and rawness of the ancestors. This is where we can also transform the pain.
Emptying and freeing myself of this old pain, I make room for the ancestors to work though me as a vessel. They invite me to travel with the snake around the world, visiting the ‘olds, those who carry seeds of deep wisdom as it is time to share this wisdom with the world.
I hear the ancestors calling and find myself surrounded by the ancestors in the desert. Those of us in the room, become the ancestors dancing a circle dance together. We are gathered under a Babob Tree in Africa and the anaconda snake slithers down the tree and again swallows me whole. The acids dissolve me and I am now anaconda traveling to the river of life.
We enter the river, traveling a long journey to the Mother from which we all came. We enter the body of the great mother Ocean. It is murky and cloudy and with rough churning waves tossing and turning us.
We come to where there others are gathered in a circle. They are whales and we become a whale too. We join in singing with the other whales a beautiful song and as we sing, the dark murky waters become brighter and clearer. There is a column of light that is emitted into the centre of this circle of beings. We are creating a strong web of light together with our songs and our voices. The Great Mother feels our presence and is held in love.
May we all work together now to hold the Net of Light strongly, anchored and steady.
With love and gratitude.