Flowing and Growing
By Gwenith Kikkawa (CCSs Member)
Once there grew a city of many kinds of trees. These trees were not like their rooted ancestors, however; they were walking trees that roamed the lands covered in thick concrete. The concrete allowed these trees to slide their roots along as they walked, but most importantly, it soothed the fears of any roots falling into a “hole trap of the unknown” where they would be sucked down into the dark depths of nothingness. Or so the legends told.
One special night during a full moon eclipse, a little pine tree woke up to a voice calling her, “Come back home, come back home….”. The little pine tree looked all around her, but could not tell where the voice was coming from. She asked other trees if they could hear the same haunting echo that sent shivers up and down her tree spine, but all of them just shrugged and returned to their work of their walking. “Where are you all going?” asked the little pine tree. But no other tree answered, they were to keep moving, keep walking.
“Come back home, come back home…”, the voice continued. The little pine tree walked all night, roaming in search of where this voice was coming from. “I don’t know where you are! I don’t know where home is!” cried the little pine tree. There was a strange new feeling, a deep ache coming from inside the little pine tree’s core that felt like an empty hole. “I want my mommy.” the little pine tree whispered through her tears. But the little pine tree did not know what a mommy was and did not recognize this new language she was speaking.
As the morning sun began to rise in the horizon, the little pine tree’s tears were soothed with the glowing, warmth bringing a smile to her face. She felt a great energy move through her limbs and body, pulling her up to stand, pulling her to walk towards the sun in a most effortless way that felt as though she was floating across the concrete. The sun guided her all the way across the city, to it’s very outer limits, when little pine tree saw that the concrete floor ended and the darkness of nothingness began. Little pine tree began to feel scared, and began to pull away in the opposite direction of the sun. And then she heard again, “Come back home, come back home…” coming from the depths of nothingness.
“The voice is coming from in there. Who is there? Come out of the darkness so I can see you!”
“Do not be afraid, little pine tree. I am your mother, your heart called for me, did you hear it?” the voice said.
“Yes, but I do not know you. Why are you frightening me? Why will you not leave me alone?”
“It is time to come home, you must find your roots little one. It is time you knew who you are and where you come from. Come closer, walk on this soil and let the helping spirits guide you.” replied Mother Earth.
And just as she said those words, the wind began to blow strongly, as the air spirits started to guide little pine tree off the concrete and on to the dark and damp soil. Little pine tree was still afraid, but was at the same time starting to feel the deep ache in her belly begin to calm.
The air spirits guided little pine tree all the way a river that sparkled as the sun shone down on it. The air spirits gently invited the little pine tree to enter into the river, “Trust in the flow. It will take you to where you need to go next.”
Hesitantly, the little pine tree placed a root into the cool river waters, then another root, and then soon the river flow swept the entire little pine tree’s body into the river. Little pine tree had never moved so fast before, and began to fill with excitement as she lay on her back gazing up into the cloud filled sky. She had never seen such beauty, almost as though she had never looked up before.
At the end of the river, the little pine tree could see a large dark circle filled with water that she was flowing towards. “What is that?” asked the panicked little pine tree. “It is the lake of Mother Earth’s womb, this is where you came from.” the water spirits explained. “How will I flow in there, it is too big, I will not know where to go!” cried little pine tree. “Trust, little pine tree, trust. The flow is still there even though you may not be able to see it.”
With a big gasp of breath, the little pine tree flowed into the mouth of the lake, where it began to float in stillness. Then through the sound of silence that surrounded her, she heard a noise that sounded like a deep creaking noise. “What is that noise?” asked little pine tree. “It is the sound of stretching wood, for you are growing, and not so little anymore.” said Mother Earth. It was true, little pine tree reached our her roots and felt how much longer they were, how much heavier they were, and how many more there seemed to be. “Are you ready to meet your brothers and sisters?” Mother Earth asked. “I have brothers and sisters?” asked the pine tree in great surprise. “Yes, you have many.” said Mother Earth.
Pine tree was brought to an edge of the lake where other roots reached out to pull her upright to stand along the shore. One tree said, “Now, dig your roots deep down into the earth, as far as you can reach, and that will help you stand up straight.” “But won’t I be sucked down into the dark depths of nothingness?” nervously asked Pine tree. “Look around you? Do we look like we have been sucked down into the dark depths of nothingness?” said the other tree. “I suppose not.” said Pine tree, feeling a little silly.
Something magical began to happen. Pine tree closed her eyes and she began to slowly reach her roots down into the soil. A burst of loving energy began to flow through her. She felt strong, and tall, and radiant. As she reached down further and further, she began to connect to the other roots of her countless brothers and sisters who were all around her, supporting her, reassuring her and keeping her company. As their roots crossed and joined together, Pine tree realized she was a part of large web of interconnectedness held by their one Mother. Through their interconnectedness they were able to share their stories and learn from each other, helping each other hold on through the large windy storms. In fact, Pine tree began talking with trees from all around Mother Earth that she had never known existed. They would tell her of elephants and lizards and strange creatures her imagination expanded in picturing.
“I came from Mother Earth, and it is to her that I have returned home, to be with my infinite family. The elements are my helping spirits that have brought me here, and for their guidance I am grateful. Where I once felt fear I now feel trust and love through my knowing of who I am and where I have come from. It is my purpose to flow and grow.” said the Big Pine Tree.
* This story was a gift to me in October 2013 when I journeyed to ask my spirit helpers for a teaching story of how I have grown throughout my CCSS trainings, and how this growth has affected my communities of family and friends around me.
Imagine you are a tree, extending your roots deep into the earth. What would it be like to:
- Trust in the flow of your growth…where would that lead you?
- Experience deep rooted interconnection…who would be there in your community?
- Explore where you came from …who are you?